The Puzzle Cut

First, before I forget, a shout out to CorneliaB, who was so kind as to advise the overcaffeinated Ms. Steel about culinary school adventures here on the Left Coast. XOXO.

We're back to the South Campus today, and I love it immensely. Now that I've spent time on both campuses, there is much to recommend the SoMa location, not the least being the general state of the neighborhood, but also the relative newness of the facilities, the bright banks of windows with the City glowing in the early morning sunlight, the long walls painted the colors of mustard and ketchup. I found myself practically skipping on the way back to class from the ladies restroom.

Because, GARDE MANGER! is awesome! Chef Duffy (nobody calls him by his given name, apparently) hails from Manchester, England, a thin edgy wiry man with a great expressive face and articulate hands. His delivery is rapid-fire, punctuated often with a quizzical "Does that make sense?" We're making cold food to be served cold. ("Not food that was once meant to be hot, and got cold.") We will be learning to make platters: fruit, cheese, meat; canapés; terrines and forcemeats; aspics; "at least 15" garnishes. "You must be painstakingly consistent."

We started with a review of the rules (in his classroom: no watches, no rolled-up sleeves, but I did learn a cool way to tuck my glasses inside my coat when I don't need them). We will be working in teams again, for the duration. I'm working with Andrea and Silvia and Travis, who didn't show up today. We'll have one week doing meat, then seafood, then vegetarian. Chef Duffy encouraged us to rename our teams, if we didn't like the given designations. "As long as they're PC. You could be" (he picked up a small orange fruit from a tray of assorted produce) "the KUMQUAT team!" Andy leaned over and said, "I don't know, 'Kumquat' is right on the edge of PC."

Chef Duffy pointed out the various features and tools in the kitchen: three long stainless work tables, stoves and a grill along one wall, three robot coupes, two commercial slicers, various terrine molds, and the like. He pulled out a desk bell from a tall metal cabinet and placed it on the worktable. "This is the class bell. When it all needs to come together by eleven o'clock, for example, and it's eleven," he rapped twice on the bell, ding ding, "then it's time. Does that make sense? Veddy good." And he returned the bell to the cabinet.

We talked about making canapés: they must be one bite and delicious. And they must not fall apart. Chef talked about thinking creatively and putting together familiar flavors: "The Super Bowl is coming up: how about a buffalo chicken canapé? A little crisp bread, some blue cheese spread, topped with a small piece of grilled chicken breast that's been sliced and tossed in sauce?"

One of the best things he said: "I like my students to be warm, and well-fed." We ate cheese (dry Jack, Gouda, Fontina, Stilton) today, and discussed the important features of a cheese platter: flow, uniformity, focal point, balance; at least one each triple cream, semi-soft, hard, blue. Then — surprise! — we had production to complete!! Apparently the GM class provides sliced meats and cheeses to the South Campus student cafeteria. The meat team sliced a whole roast beef, two hotel pans full, and it totally brought me back to my deli days. (Before Silvia was born.) But I still know how to take apart the slicer, and how to clean it. No major technological changes on that piece of equipment.

After production (Seafood sliced cheese, and Veg made a gallon of salad dressing), Chef Duffy sliced up some fruit — two melons, a pomelo, some strawberries — and casually arranged them on a flat mirrored tray while he talked about methods (cutting both ends off the melon, standing it on end and cutting off the rind in large strips with a French knife; scooping out the seeds with the heel of his thumb into a bowl, because "using a scoop may damage the fruit, and" (without irony) "they have to be perfect."

As a finale, using a peeled kiwi, he demonstrated the Puzzle Cut. It's a two knife trick. Insert a paring knife into the center of the fruit, in between and in line with the ends. Cut an even slot through the middle of the fruit, staying away from either end. Put the fruit on the cutting board with the knife still in it, and with the flat of the knife parallel to the board. Using a French knife, cut a diagonal line from the slit .... shoot, this is just not going to work. I need pictures. Stay tuned.